It’s a cleaning day

I have found that Faustus likes to lay on my finished knitting stuff. He’s my basement buddy and helps me stay calm/centered if my brain decides to go extra weird on me. If I’m doing good, he goes and lays in the opened tote I have of finished shawls and is just the happiest little asshole of a cat he can be.

And now back to cleaning. We’re working on doing regular housework along with other things like Jamie rearranging the cabinets and pantry and I’ve got to go and finish hacking away at the elderberry beside the fence. I think it’s great we’ve got elderberry, and I find it hilarious that it’s shown up during a very busy and stressful year so I can’t take advantage of the Surprise!bounty.


feel the burn

I had a Shiatsu massage yesterday. First time in…six years (I didn’t believe it, but they looked at the records and it’d been 6 freaken years since I was able to get one!)

Shiatsu is amazing. You basically get the snot beaten out of you by a licensed professional in order to feel better. The majority of stiffness/pain doesn’t usually show up until the next day.

Today is that next day and I realize that I cannot bounce back from the massage like I once did. Especially after getting your neck/skull realigned because you’re turning into a human turtle without meaning to. Also getting your shoulders popped back into the correct place is weird as hell.

But, it is pretty amazing to learn that something gristle-like hanging out on your rib getting pushed apart will make the pain in your elbow stop. It’s pretty neat.

The downside is, we both learned that my left side is weird. We’d thought it was just my left foot and ankle that’s messed up (yay swollen foot for like…4 years), but no. It’s my entire left side that is puffier to the point where even my ribs show a difference.

The human body is weird.

And we both learned that my left arm doesn’t move in a certain direction. This is due to the arm being pulled out of socket when I was like 3 or 4. I have no memory of what happened and every time Mom has talked about it, she’s ended up in tears so I have no idea to what extent the damage was. The best way to describe it is: y’know that “skin the cat” move you can do on the monkey bars when you’re a kid? You hang onto the bar, get your feet through the hole that your arms create, and basically do a flip while holding onto the bar. Yeah, I can’t do that. It causes an extreme amount of pain.


I was told that I needed to adopt a Herculean stance in order to make sure my ribs don’t try to go weird and so it can help my shoulders. I was also informed that I need to make sure I take the time to bend my neck upwards, and not just when I realize my neck hurts from looking down too much. And, I need to get a mouth guard because my gritting/grinding is causing my jaw to go out of alignment and is also causing a majority of the pain at the base of my skull.

I’ve been actively trying to stop gritting my teeth. It’s something I do when I’m mad or even subconsciously and I don’t realize until I feel the pressure in my temples. So I’ve been trying to do the whole “drop/loosen your shoulders, make sure your teeth are apart” thing.


It’s a dreary day out there

Rain came back yesterday with Flash Flood warnings, and apparently we’re supposed to get hit with more rain as the week continues. The heavy rain yesterday and constant drizzle today reminded us that, when the rain hits the right way, part of our roof leaks. It’s strange as hell, but something that we’re kind of used to. It’s not a massive leak, more like “why is the floor damp?” It’s like going into the basement and realizing there is a thin layer of water on the floor from where the rain’s come in from up under the door leading to the back yard. But, this is an “old house” (first part built somewhere between 1900 and 1930, last addition to the house was plopped on about…2002? It was a few years before we moved in)

Jamie’s determined to make today an Art Day, which I am all for, so he’s been sketching out a few things in between doing some basic cleaning (and making food). I like his sketches, they’re fun.

I spent a few minutes trying to straighten out SuperSekritProject in hopes of getting a decent photo of it and re-measured it. On the loom, it had measured approximately 42×60, but having it on the bed, it measured approximately 50×30. I’m going to stick with the original approximation because, while it’s off the loom, it’s not blocked. I don’t have an area where I can block a yarn project (I also don’t have materials to block a yarn project), and it’s been rolling up onto itself. I figure I can give it to the unsuspecting recipient and they can do what the want with it. Tie a ribbon around it and be done. I got a few photos of it, so that’s fine with me.

I’m washing the last of the fabric that needs to be washed. I should’ve done it months ago, but…yeah. It didn’t happen. But I’m glad I did it today because apparently the bottom bolt soaked up a lot of rain water and that needed to be taken care of before mold set in. Now I just need to figure out where I’m going to put the last 4 pieces. Jamie wants it all to go into totes (we don’t have enough) and I’m just like “Ok” and work around it.

I started on a new shawl with a skein of yarn Jamie found for like a dollar. I wasn’t sure about it at first (because it’s this pink to blue kind of yarn and the skein makes it look kinda weird), but now that I’ve gone through 3 different colours, it’s looking pretty cool and I’m pleased with it.

Writing has…devolved into me just making random notes to myself. I did add a sentence onto one story before going “stuff happens here,” writing another sentence, and then writing “blah blah blah, fancy journalism here.” before giving up and going back to the documentary I was listening to/watching. Hey, it happens. I’ll see if the next time I go look at it, this will help me move on instead of dwelling on what to put down and then that way I can continue writing. I go from point A to point B, I don’t go point A to point C to point B. It’s hard for me, but maybe this whole “insert ____ here” will help.

gearing up for the holidays

That’s a bit scary, innit? Gearing up for something that happens a few months in advance because I’ve worked in retail long enough to be like “…we got our first pallet of something with the word “Christmas” on it on Saturday. Motherfucker.” and a resigned sigh followed by a shaking of the head.  But, I work in an industry that focuses one season ahead and bases all their plans around the largest American holiday (Christmas).

This is also that time of year where everyone either gets the flu or a headcold and everyone is snotty, sneezy, dizzy, etc and it just flows along work because we work in a germ factory (especially when people don’t wash their hands after going to the restroom. ew)

Jamie’s already gotten the paperwork for how many turkeys he should be expecting in the next couple of weeks, clearly labeled for each week that they’re coming in. I’m highly entertained and warning his people “Y’all have fun with that!”  because, man, for real, I had no idea how obsessive people become over freaken turkeys. But, this also means I’m going to have some very angry customers when I tell them “sorry, we’re not allowed to cut your pre-cooked, pre-packaged, non-boned turkey/ham” because apparently that’s a thing now. I think it’s bullshit and I’ll still do it because, if someone gets mad at me, I can always point out the whole “Our priority is to make customers happy. I am not going to deny some of my customers just because you think it takes away from us. It makes them happy, it makes them grateful, and 9 times out of 10, they come back and buy stuff from us.”

I was planning on updating more, but Jamie is now awake enough to snot and snort and get his shoes on, so we’re off to the store in hopes of beating the morning traffic and the people who do panic-shopping

Phone update

Small phone update!

Because I have no idea what day it is, barely register what month it is, and am floating somewhere in a weird fugue mindstate

. I am going to miss my self imposed deadline of a Halloween story for Halloween, and I’m ok with this. I’m at a part where I need to write “stuff happens here” and continue with the vague idea of what happens next so I can finish the draft

. I have started working on bits for two separate short stories and have written down the base idea for a third thanks to a really stupid tweet I saw. I feel kind of dumb for not thinking of one of the other ideas before, but I guess it was one of those “you see X thing, keep it in the back of your head for later, and it’ll pop up when it needs” kind of things.

Working on that idea reminds me that I need to work on two /other/ ideas I have laying about somewhere, which /then/ reminds me that I have a notebook somewhere in the house that has “Pig Dreams” and id really like to finish that at some point (because: that’s Mickie and Jeff’s house I’m using, like how I remember it from childhood. Before their haphazard blackberry bushes kind of…took over half the back yard. And before the pool Dad helped put in turned into the tadpole pond)

It’s a weird cycle to be in.

. I am working my way through SuperSekritProject. I have anywhere between 22 and 28 inches left to do and then /I’m done./ and I can go and do a different project and why am I doing this? Besides: this coworker is great and I have a lot of yarn (although I did go out and buy this yarn specifically for this idea when Jamie got the cat stickers for his badge)

My self imposed goal of “I dunno, October” is a few short weeks away and I’d like to get it done soon. So we can give this to them so they can wash it because my house is…not newborn friendly (cats and dogs and Mander hair, oh my)

The plus side is, the coworker has seen me working on it and hasn’t noticed it’s for them yet 😆 but at least they know that I’m usually making /something/ so there’s that.

. I got messaged a screen shot of how much rain they’re expecting us to get and I’m like “????” How are we projected to get “24+” inches of rain when North Carolina is projected to get less than us? Granted they’ll probably get all the wind.

. I told Cheese (coworker) the other day that I talk about people online at work but give them nicknames. He asked for his and I told him, his response was “how original” and I’m like “dude I thought of Phil Coulson.” And he didn’t believe me. We spent time trying to figure out what we should call Eyegor (other coworker). He said Hunchback, I said Punk. Jamie suggested Eyegor because it’s funny and we like /Young Frankenstein/

. Back to knitting and listening to audiobooks. I hope to do more updates soon

what’s going on

Life update! (omg I’m so tired. can I like sleep for two days or something?)

Dad finally got released from the hospital day before yesterday (woo!) and Jamie and I got them from their house to take them grocery shopping. My mom hasn’t driven in years (safety reasons due to her disability) and dad was her transportation. Until he can drive again (he’s a stubborn asshole, he’ll be driving again by Christmas), it’ll be an amalgamation of Jamie, aunts, and an uncle driving them to where they need to go (grocery store, bank, doctor appointments).

We got to the store, where dad decided that he was Getting Out of the Car, and Jamie made sure they had front-door service.

A brief rundown:
+ Dad immediately hit the door to get into the store. Twice.
+ He almost hit another person riding in one of the rider carts
+ He ignored the frozen section (which we had to go back to later on) because he wanted coffee
+ He spent 20 minutes slowly making his way to the coffee cakes, missing the aisle twice despite directions, and talking about how he had to have his coffee cake. He was disappointed it was Hostess and not Little Debbie, but said it was good enough
+ He hit mom’s rider cart 3 times
+ He almost plowed over one of my regular’s little girl. I apologized in advance, but she thought it was kind of hilarious and was ok with it (because you can tell my dad has something wrong with him)
+ He hit 3 people
+ He ran into multiple displays
+ He tried to take out one of my coworkers at the knees
+ He disappeared on me when I went to get a new rider cart cuz his died
+ I spent more time chasing him around than I did helping them get groceries. Jamie was with mom, who found the whole thing hilarious
+ Instead of staying in the rider cart when we were checking out, he parked it who knows where and stood at an empty register and tried to argue about walking out the door
+ Jamie brought the car back to the entrance and dad slammed right into the car in the rider cart mom was using because she and I told him to get his ass in that seat.

The weirder part:

This is the first time in 15 years that my dad has said more than a sentence to me. My family holds stupid grudges, and he’s the worst about it.

This is the first time in about 14 or 15 years that my dad has said anything to Jamie that wasn’t a threat against him. (besides the time about 5 years ago when he straight up ignored me and asked Jamie if he wanted a sewing table [sewing machine built into a desk] because he wanted it out of the house)

Jamie and I figure that it’s because he’d been cooped up in a hospital for 2 and a half months and hadn’t really been able to interact with many people. We guess that when he gets better and is able to talk to people he usually talks to then he’ll go back to ignoring us.


We finally got out of the store, brought them back home and brought in their groceries. I helped mom get them out of the bags and dad almost tripped over the case of water we got. I made a comment along the lines of “that’s just what we need, for you to trip and die.”

Dad said that was fine and I told him I wasn’t ready to roll his ass under the porch just yet and he responded with something and all I heard was the word “prison.” This is because I am losing my hearing and dad’s loud voice is about as low-volume as mine is now.

It was a tiring, mortifying, hilarious excursion and now I feel like I need a desk calander or something to set up on the wall at the desk so I can make notes of doctors appointments and whatnot for them so we can figure out if we can take them or if my uncle Mike needs to take them.

Dad told me that the medical staff who worked with him told them that they’d never seen someone recover so fast from a massive stroke like he did and I told him “That’s because you’re stubborn.”

He went “Ya damn right.”

He’s a stubborn asshole and he knows it. He’ll be back to almost normal by Christmas.


Other than that!

We have Upper Management coming to work on Sunday (to tell us everything that is wrong with our store because we are the worst store in the district because most of the employees don’t give a shit). So everyone’s been freaking out and doing extra cleaning and I’m of two minds. One is: some of this stuff should’ve been beaten into everyone’s heads anyway (pick up stuff on the floor if you see it, don’t assume someone else will come back and get it) The second is: maybe now the department will stay clean like it’s supposed to.

I try to keep the department clean. I know I’m a walking disaster, but I try to clean my shit up. But, the dm is like “by the time we’re done, you’ll be able to eat off the floor.” She is damned and determined to get that place as perfect as possible.

I had a customer last night who had a bunch of yarn in her buggie, so I asked what she was going to be making with it. She told me we had a bunch of yarn on sale and we gabbed about yarn for a few minutes before she wandered off and I immediately texted Jamie about it. 10 minutes later, I didn’t know he’d come back to work, he’s rolling up with 3 bags of yarn.

I love my bear. He knows me so well.

Speaking of yarn:

I am working on SuperSekritProject, which Manager Happy saw me working on and he thought it was super cool. He asked me to make him one as well and, y’know, maybe I will. I still gotta make one of the overnight guys a beanie (if he’ll ever tell me what colour he wants. It’s been forever and he still only asks me if I’ll make him a hat. I told him to tell me what colour he wants and it’s not a problem because he’s a great guy and…I have a ton of yarn). I’ve got…approximately…32 inches left on it? I’ll have to measure and see. I’m really not sure. And, I’ve got just over a month to finish it (omg)

MJ asked me if I could make a shawl for someone if they provided the yarn. Yeah, sure, whatever. Might be a little bit though cuz I’m working on SuperSekritProject and she asked for photos of the shawls I’ve made to give an idea of sizing. If I could find my fabric measuring tape, I’d measure one of the shawls I’ve got up here to let her know, but I went to my IG account and screenshotted some of the pics I’d posted up there and sent them to her as a “maybe these will help” kinda thing. Haven’t really heard back yet and I’m cool with that.

Writing has come to a pseudo halt. Mainly because I’m tired and doing other things instead of sitting my butt down and actually writing (this is why I’m not a professional). I was listening to last week’s NoSleep episode and one of their stories made me think of an idea and I’m like Noooo stop. Stop Brain. We have so many other stories to work on, stop being all “Ooooo Shiny” when a new idea pops up.

So I wrote like half a page of notes in the notebook I’m using for my Halloween story that I need to finish. It’s mixed in with an idea that keeps poking me and telling me it’s a YA setting and I’m like “really. I know you like YA stories and stuff, but why are you wanting to make a YA story?” But, whatever I guess. I’ll see what comes out and hopefully it’ll be a finished product.

Jamie went to Harbor Freight yesterday looking for pet-safe ant killer (it’s been a few years since we’ve had ants all in the kitchen and guess what we woke up to a few days ago? Ants everywhere). He said they’d used it when Poedog was little and it was overwhelmingly peppermint.

He didn’t find it, but he did come home with a machete.